Union Executes Twinkie Hostage

Members of the Bakery, Confectionery, Tobacco Workers and Grain Millers Union announced today that the Twinkie, held hostage by the Union for the last several months, has been executed.
"Taking a page from our Misloom brothers' playbook, we beheaded the Twinkie at 6:00 am this morning," stated union boss Joey"Dough Man" Antonelli. He elaborated that "Hostess” refused to give in to our demands, and that's the end of the Twinkie!"

Representatives from Hostess said that the matter had been out of their hands for quite some time, especially since newly reelected President B. Hussein Obama spent time on the picket line last week encouraging the striking union members.

They noted that the Twinkie had always been a positive, upbeat kind of confection, and said that the world will miss him. (source)